Monday, January 30, 2012


How much you can understand and at the same time how about you?


Serious i don't understand. I've lots of thing i don't understand. Is it a feeling from me only or its a reality? Some times i really cannot identify which is which. No matter where i am and who i with, i also have the same feeling. I always felt that i am the left out one. Where ever i go, i also felt that i am always the one who people will always forget. OKAY, maybe its just what i think, maybe its not or maybe its yes.

How ever how i close with you, i still feel there a big distance between us. We are not talking to each other even there's only both of us. Don't talk about girls and boys, but as a normal person, will you not talking to your friend that sitting beside you while both doing nothing? Unless both of them just fight right! Hmmmm, i have no idea and this situation always makes me so down and no mood. Hate being ignored by people.

And you know what? i asked: "are you going to ignore me?" and he answered :"yes. cos im going out now!" WTH... i seriously speechless man!! Why i always faced those who don't like to text? When ever i want to talk and share, you and you and you will always just "pass by". I really feel so alone like the song of 2NE1 "alone". I am not meaning there's no one who chat with me but when ever when i text you means i wants to talk to you and i want to tells you about me. But you you you you you will just end the topic so fast and easy.

Last week, i found out so many tiny and cute stuff. And i realized there're few of them gave me so many things. He can be very good to you when they wants you, but when they already have one then they willbe totally different.
(1) Exp- Ques: Can you help me to check what problem to my laptop?
(last time) : rush? okok, later pass me your laptop la.
(now) : HARH!!! *unwilling face*
I was like (stop), : "ok, i will ask my friend to help me to check."
This is the different between last time and now.
There's alots more i can tells but i think this is enough.

Girls will always giving out some tips, just depends you get it anot only!
And now i will not asking more already. Thanks for making me going to be such a "moudiu" person. I should say thank you! =)

My appearance doesn't makes any different, so just ............ hmmmm.


Sunday, January 29, 2012


" Different of ME "
and this is why

this is so NOT ME !!

and you only can see this "ellie" in picture.
well, anyway i still like it even its not my style XD
but please don't hope i will be like this ya!

*strawberry apple orange*

Sunday, January 22, 2012

UGLY from 2NE1


i like the lyrics....

i think im ugly
and nobody want to love me
just like her i wanna be pretty
i wanna be pretty
don't lie to my face cause i know im ugly

i think im ugly
and nobody want to love me
just like her i wanna be pretty
i wanna be pretty
don't lie to my face telling me im pretty

all alone~
im all alone~
all alone~
im all alone~
im always all alone~~~~



*there's always happened...

When always im trying to start a topic to avoid the weird situation and there's always kena ignored. If really, next time i wont be talking anymore. And i wish i will never asking for people help if i can make it mysef, seriously! i don't like to see people's face while i do nothing wrong.

And always when i need some one to talk to, there's always "no reply" or "one message conversation". If im texting you means i want to chat with you but there's always ....... i feel so sad, because i feel so not important.

It just makes me feel, and im sorry. There's plenty of names in my phone book. But there's no one i can really text to. Because i know :-
- this is always busy
- this will not reply
- this is not good to be chat
- this will not be able to chat with you
- this have no topic to talk to
- this is not interested with your stuff

I know there's always some one that wish to talk to me and dont be misunderstand what im writing right now. i just feel sad why.....

Okay, i know i my such a emo. But can't help, sorry.

*just tells....

Some times i rather you just say it out honestly, and without any like " dont tell, later she not happy". but if i found it out later under this situation i will more sad. i already understand and accept what is going on beside me. i wish just let it be, nothing wrong letting me know and i knew there always no place for me to join. =) so no worry about that =) im okay and im accepting everything now on.

i m happy when i seeing them feel happy after i helping them, that's why i always give help whenever people need help. But some is always not appreciate and will not be remember what i did for them. People is always will remember the bad of you and never remember what the goods. Some always telling me that, don't be so kind. Because people will never appreciate. But cannot help, because i can't make it being not to help when seeing people asking for help.

Karma, i trust it! people will pay for it on what they did. =)
One whole month, i "earn" a lot. Found out many things. And same goes to my close friend. He got the same problem too. And now he finally understand what's the feeling. There's always some "ugly" one with a nice face. You will never know which is "human" and which is "ghost". And you can see who is really supporting you and which is not. That's why i said i earned a lot.

*there's always some different one....

You can see why people is so concern about you and what is going with you, what the problem about. And there's is always got 2 types. One is will keep asking and so exciting and at the same time so worrying, another one is "oooh, isee", "just ignore them lo" (story end). Don't even care about it and don't even want to know about the story. Do you think i should feel sad getting this kind of replies??