RAINING

my heart is raining very heavily.....
damn sad and down, cant even stop crying. cry until even cant breath but who knows? why should i cry? i should not! but i cant help..

these keep repeating in my mind
ALWAYS

"why people dun like me?
why people like to make a fool on me?
why people always scold me?
why people always dun like to friend with me?
why people DUN WANT me?"

that is all my sadness. my friends are always saying me that so many people like me n chase me why u still not happy? i cant answer them. who the one who really cares n loves me? my family always..... but i wil never let them know that i was so so so sad right now. even i dunwan to let people see my ugly face right now.

do my attitude got problem? the person who chat with me today make me think back many things. my attitudes, my words, my feeling....... sorry i admit that i was like that before but i can explain all these... i do agree everyone think that im a person like that but do anyone willing to tell me whats the problem?!! because i will fatt lan za or dun foon or maybe bu suang? please let me know and i try to change.

but i can say, long time i nv cry until like dat already. because i really that sad? i duno! when i think back that people said "nei zap fan lei gah", "mou yan oi nei jor le"(no people want you already) when i was small, i heard this from many of my friends.. maybe this make my thinking become like this already... i do know everyone wants good for me, scold me because they care about me. but sometimes it doesnt mean its really help. if u know what person im then u shoold use what kind of way to concern me , then ony i can accept mah right? agree?

sorry for so emo'ing lately and thanks for al my friends who concern me and accompany.

i just hope i can be more happy and more more happy :)